Well, this is one bill I can really get behind.

WASHINGTON—Secretary of Transportation Mary Peters unveiled a new $270 billion federal project Monday to build special lanes for dangerous and careless drivers on most major U.S. highways.

"These new lanes are for the millions of drivers who can't be bothered with speed limits, turn signal use, or not careening madly out into oncoming traffic," Peters said during the opening ceremony for the first reckless-driving route, a steeply banked, guardrail-lined on-ramp to I-395 outside Arlington, VA.

There are early indications that one lane may not be enough here in Massachusetts. I'm betting they build that special lane here for the millions thousands hundreds two or three dozens of drivers who *do* pay attention to speed limits, use turn signals, and don't go careening madly out into oncoming traffic.

That'll protect us from them. Tourists.



And before anyone asks me, yes, I do realize it's a story from The Onion...and that's a damned shame.